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 P.A.T.H.S. Blog 
Welcome to our blog spot where Carolina will post updates, events of interest and thoughts.
If you would like to comment or respond to this blog email Carolina at carolina@postabortionpaths.org.nz
Your comments are confidential unless you express otherwise, and comments will not automatically be published.
You may also be interested in upcoming events (click here for more details)
17 February 2012
Well here we are well into another year. Hope it has started well for you.
We are going through another transition with some changes of people in
the Trust and are adjusting slowly. Still looking for more people to
help on the Trust.
So what's happening?
Of note is the Christchurch Support Group starting up again. It will be facilitated by two of our team - Karen and Maree.
Also 9-10 March will be the first P.A.T.H.S. Post Abortion Seminar of the year, and it is being held in Christchurch.
I will be doing an oral presentation at the Abortion Providers'
Conference in March in Rotorua, and one at the combined NZ Psychological Society and
NZ College of Clinical Psychologists' Conference in April in Wellington, so will be representing P.A.T.H.S.
there. We also have an abstract submitted for the NZ College of Midwives
Conference later in the year. We did a poster presentation at last
year's conference and it was well received.
We are still hoping to expand our counselling service, and are looking
for counselling, psychotherapist or psychologist groups to possibly
organise and host a training event in their area. I am happy to come
and facilitate a P.A.T.H.S. seminar at
a cost. It is our vision to have trained help in all the main centres
and
grow the number of people available to help people affected by abortion
or struggling after a termination of pregnancy. If you are
interested or know anyone who may be interested contact us.
Am very aware that the 22nd February is coming up fast. Remembering all
the loss of life and those affected badly by our earthquakes! Still no
end in sight. We take pause to reflect on the hearts and lives of all
for whom there has been stress, trauma and heartbreak, and whose inner
cracks will take time to recover from just as the outer cracks have
left their mark. May we all find the strength and hope we need to ride
this through. The grief is real, the struggle ongoing. This is life
here and now.
One of the remembrance actitivities around Christchurch on that day is
The River of Flowers project is being lead by Healthy Christchurch and
the Avon-Otakaro Network (AvON). On 22 February 2012 from 8am to 8pm,
people will be able to drop a flower in the River and write a message
for a Tree of Hope. Local community groups will host the sites and at
12:51 two minutes silence will be held, followed by the release of red
helium-filled biodegradable balloons. To find your closest River of
Flowers site and learn how you can contribute, go to: www.healthychristchurch.org.nz
Take care, kia kaha and go gently one and all.
Carolina
30 December 2011
The year is drawing to a close. And just when we thought things
were settling down Christchurch here was rocked again by earthquakes.
Quite unnerving. Still we hope people managed to come together for
Christmas. There are certainly things to be thankful for even amidst
all the calamity of the year. And we look ahead to next year, hopeful
that things will improve, be restored enough that people can move on
with their lives without fear.
Since the last blog we have loaded our latest newsletter
up on this site for you to view at your leisure. As a charitable
organisation we are mindful of costs in producing and distributing
newsletters. A decision was made to email the newsletter to people and
make it available on line to provide easy access. Change is in the air
and it all takes some adjusting to. For my part, I get rather
bamboozled with computers, and still am rather technophobic so this is
a big challenge. But am slowly getting my head around the website and
suchlike. Hope it works!
Enough ramblling. Wishing you all good things in the year ahead.
Carolina
22 December 2011
Christmas is here. It means different things to different people!
For many it is a time of celebration for sure, but for others less so.
For some it is about the holiday, for others it is a holy day.
For some it is a time of family coming together, for others a reminder of family loss or rupture.
For some it is about the gifts, for others it is about the giving.
What does it mean for you this year?
Wherever you are and whatever it means take care and be gentle with yourself and others.
May it be a time of peace, a time of reflection, a time of gathering hope.
Carolina
15 November 2011
Here we are in November. I have just returned from assisting with the
Rachel's Vineyard Retreat in Wellington. It was a good weekend in
tranquil surroundings. The process of the retreat never ceases to amaze
me. It is intense and beautiful, challenging and uplifting. For post
abortive participants it is a step on the journey of healing. The
experience of a being in the loving safe space has hopefully been
helpful and special. There is invariably ongoing work that needs to
happen, however for most it is an opportunity to pause and reflect on
their abortions, what it has meant for them personally and in their
lives and relationships. There is a deep desire for peace and
connection with the loved little ones lost in the abortion. These
little ones are named and their lives remembered and honoured. The
reflections and rituals used are richly symbolic and powerful. The next
Retreat will be in February. For more information goto http://rachelsvineyard.org.nz/
Carolina
11 October 2011
A few more shakes for Christchurch to keep us on edge. And
coping with the stress and worry of the rebuild is affecting different
people in different ways. Waiting, a sense of limbo, uncertainty the
order of the day. And meantime for all intents and purposes life goes
on. For us new grandchildren are a delight and we are planting the
garden in hope. On another front I feel frustration, as we have people
needing post abortion help in areas where we do not yet have
counselling partners available. We are needing opportunities to recruit
and train people who can journey with those affected by abortion
through the programme. How can we generate more interest in churches
and counselling agencies, with those working with women and families
who will encounter people directly or indirectly affected and who may
be in a position to respond? Ideally we need people in various centres
to organise and host post abortion seminars and invite people to come.
Help put the word out there if you can and direct people to us who may
be able to help in providing opportunities for training. Thanks in
anticipation.
Carolina
29 September 2011
Recently as I was driving family to the airport my car was
rear-ended. In the moments before the crash as I heard the bang and saw
the van behind me keep coming I had a sense of helplessness and
powerlessness and inevitability... and there was nothing I could do
about it. I wake with images and sensations from that experience.
Fortunately no-one was hurt, but it was still a shock and trauma and
loss.
I am aware that those kind of feelings sometimes accompany
someone facing a pregnancy-abortion decision and they can feel
overwhelmed and disempowered in their situation. I know it is not the
same thing as a car accident, but nor is it often a matter of being a
well considered or real choice in that situation - it is not something
wanted. There is often a sense of "it's the only option" really. I hear
these feelings often in the stories of women, and men, who come for
help - it can be hard to really understand what that is like unless you
have yourself experienced something that produces similar types of
feelings. And then my sense of the feelings or what it might
mean, though described in similar words, may be quite different from
yours. We are so complex and different.
On another note I am thinking it would be good to have an
events of interest section on this website to highlight healing
services, trainings and provide links?! Mmmmm will think on it - watch
this space!
Carolina
19 September 2011
Taking time and space to reflect on an abortion experience,
one's own or someone else's close, can help you to get in touch with
some of the deeper feelings, make sense of and find meaning in and
through the experience. It may assist with starting the healing process
or it may be a way to find closure. This event in the south of the
South Island may be of interest to those in the area or even others who
may wish to travel specially for it. Although it may feel difficult and
painful to front up, the hope is that within a supportive place like
this one might find help and support to allow grief to surface and be a
way of acknowledging the personal loss(es) and change abortion has
perhaps caused.
DOES ABORTION TOUCH YOUR HEART?
A Reflection and Healing Day - Friday 28 October 2011 - Winton - Southland
You are invited by Voice for Life Winton to this day for anyone touched or affected by abortion.
Marina Young (Buttons Project) will share her story "What happened matters".
Also Dr Normal MacLean will share from his years of experience as an Obstetrician and Gynaecologist.
Contact Liz 03 248 5084 or 027 818 7984 for more information
13 September 2011
There has been much in
the news about the devastation and loss from 9/11 - the terrorist
attack of 2001 in the USA. Who can forget?
The loss and devastation for many post abortive parents has
happened, but it is not public, and in many cases there is no
acknowledgement. There is an empty space where their children once
were! Their loss of life does not make headline news but is no less
significant. There is so much in and around those who have lost
children through abortion or termination of pregnancy that downplays
and causes them to hide their pain.
Last night I facilitated a meeting on the subject of Early
Medical Abortions (EMAs), which are set to become the new method of
terminating pregnancy for many in NZ. It is the way to have an abortion
without surgery.
In reality EMAs are still the intentional termination of a
pregnancy by an induced miscarriage. Although presented as a simple
solution, I wonder if it too is complex. The perception of its
advantages such as privacy, early action, being less invasive and more
cost effective may appeal. However the reality of what actually happens
remains and the effects ought not be underestimated. This is of
particular concern where a person experiences more than one
pregnancy-baby loss, as the grief and issues may be compounded.
Read more about Early Medical Abortions in our newsletter article and online on the Abortion Services NZ website http://www.abortion.gen.nz/procedures/medical.html
What are your thoughts? Carolina
4 September 2011
This is the first entry into our P.A.T.H.S. blog - another step forward as we grow the organisation and our outreach.
Firstly I would like to remember all fathers on this
Fathers' Day. Whatever your situation, remember the dignity of who you
are and the important role you have. Special thoughts for those who
have lost children through abortion. Warm thoughts, wishes and blessings for you.
I am mindful too that today marks the beginning of earthquakes
for our fair city of Christchurch one year ago. Though the events of
the past year are very real it still feels surreal, as people are
dealing with the various impacts in their sphere. Loss, trauma, damage,
collapse, destruction, death, fear, uncertainty, safety, cracks, being
prepared, rebuild... are some of the words in common usage as a result.
Outer earthquakes are matched with inner
earthquakes for many, but certainly for all at some level there has
been significant disruption to the normal flow of life. Recovery is
ongoing and is happening though we are living on shaky ground even now.
Someone mentioned the number of over 8,000 quakes over this period -
that is mind boggling.
Numbers of our team
have been affected by changed circumstances which has meant
limitations, e.g. fewer counsellors available. The Support
Group has also been on hold, as participants and team members have had
other things to deal with from the earthquake. The
prospect of less
funding available this year may mean rationalising activities e.g.fewer
newsletters and fewer away events to promote P.A.T.H.S.. But we are still here and our service continues. People are beginning
to surface it seems and even over the past few weeks we have had more
inquiries, and there is a need to be available. We will be as proactive
as we can in responding to those seeking our help.
A really lovely note is noticing how the spring is springing. Amidst
calamity and so much pain the seasons continue in their usual cycle.
There are blossoms on some trees and spring bulbs in flower in many
gardens. This is heartening. Incredible how the colour and new life of
this season inspire and give hope. The sun is shining today and it so
lifts people's spirits.
Go gently everyone.
If you would like to comment or respond to this blog
feel free to email Carolina at carolina@postabortionpaths.org.nz
N.B. Your comments are confidential unless you express otherwise, and comments will not automatically published.
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